it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Randomize
