So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We need to get me chipped asap
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
