OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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