dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
