Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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