How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
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