Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
