she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Are these your boobs on my camera?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
