you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
