weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
