let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
