i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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