yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
