I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
