Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize