today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
