After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I love you. Go after that dick
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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