God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Barsexuality is the new black.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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