so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Randomize
