so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
i out mim tonsoeep
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
