Only a mothe r could love this liver
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
