But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
