Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
3pm strippers are depressing
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize