i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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