Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Everything about him screamed your future.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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