They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
