And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
