fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
should my penis look like a turkey
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
