Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
