it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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