so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
