Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
