why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
