Apparently you make a good broom.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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