ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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