Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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