A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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