yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize