You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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