ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
