Bisexual people are plain selfish.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
