That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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