Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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