I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
