You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
