we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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