I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
