you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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