can we get nightvision for the apartment?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
