Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
