I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
